It doesn't say how he increased past employers' output, decreased production costs or improved product quality. These all are key responsibilities of a manufacturing manager.

Second, like most résumé, the introduction contains many buzzwords and phrases, such as "diversified experience," "excellent communication and analytical skills," "coaching," "mentoring," "leadership" and "strategic and tactical process improvement initiatives." Still, readers don't know what contributions Mr. Bill made and how he improved any company's manufacturing performance. They have no reason to keep reading his résumé.

"Nothing turns off executive recruiters more than an introductory section that has no substance," says Dave Opton, chief executive officer of ExecuNet Inc., an Internet-based center for career management (ExecuNet is an alliance partner of CareerJournal.com).

Judy Rosemarin, president of Sense-Able Strategies Inc., a New York career management firm, agrees: "Never begin a résumé with statements like, 'A dynamic, results-oriented executive with a record of achievement at driving companies to the next level of success; also a creative problem solver and team player who thrives on challenge, excels under pressure, and continually exceeds corporate goals.' This is fluff, and readers know it."

Mr. Opton speaks frequently with executive recruiters about job openings. "They tell me that introductory sections consisting of generalized statements about responsibilities, accompanied by verbose descriptors regarding a job hunter's capability, do nothing to interest them in reading a résumé," he says. "What they want to see are factual statements about successes, not fluff."

To make his introduction more powerful, Mr. Bill organized it around his accomplishments, as follows:

This introductory section clearly showcases Mr. Bill's successes. He used a banner headline to convey his strengths, and he presents his most important achievements. He concludes the section with additional information rounding out his background.

The change produced immediate results. After re-entering the job market in August, Mr. Bill sent 50 resumes. Within 15 days, he had eight interviews, which led to two firm and two pending offers. He started work Sept. 1 as director of supply chain and logistics for a Santa Ana, Calif.-based producer of capital equipment for computer-component manufacturing.

"Don't tell readers how good you are, show them," says Ms. Rosemarin. "Give them facts and figures -- results. The results you show will excite the reader. Then they'll read on."

If your résumé starts with a convincing statement about your capability and successes, then in the brief moment your résumé is scanned, employers will be more likely to pause and call you for an interview.

Beyond the Initial Scan
Interviewers who are impressed with your introduction will read your entire résumé. For the strongest possible presentation, follow these guidelines.

• Limit your résumé to two pages in length, and never use more than three pages. Summarize your early employment experiences to reduce length if necessary.
• Prepare your résumé in 10-point or 11-point Arial or Times Roman typeface. Avoid fancy fonts.
• For each employment experience, briefly state your responsibilities, followed by a description of your accomplishments. Precede each with a bullet. Focus your accomplishments on important contributions for past employers. Nothing is more impressive than explaining how you increased revenues and profits, improved product or service quality, increased operating efficiencies or reduced costs.
• When discussing achievements, use numbers to show their extent. Also use the jargon of your field. For example, marketers should talk about brand management, market segmentation and competitive intelligence. If you're in sales, discuss your strengths in consultative sales, solution sales, CRM, relationship building and management and closing. Manufacturing pros should relate their knowledge of process improvement, efficiency enhancement and cost reduction, including the technologies they implemented, such as lean manufacturing, Kaizen, Kanban, JIT, TQM and cellular manufacturing.
• Use a strong action verb, such as planned, led, initiated, grew, drove, increased, improved or reduced, to begin each accomplishment statement.

Taking these steps can help you to write a powerful résumé and improve your chances of landing interviews and the job you want.

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